GLP-1s and mourning your old self?

Hong Kong Yanpep International
The mourning piece is real and mostly skipped in the success narrative - when the body changes that much after 23 years of trying, there's a grieving process for the version of yourself that fought so hard without the right tool. The old self didn't fail; the biology made it structurally harder. What usually helps is holding both: the relief of it finally working and the grief of what it cost to get there. Most people find the identity shift completes somewhere in year two when the new normal stops feeling like a borrowed life and starts feeling like the one that fits.
 
More people understanding the grieving piece than you realize is probably the most reassuring thing to say to the OP who posted this. The medication handles the physical piece but the 23-year relationship with struggling doesn't just dissolve when the scale moves. That process has its own timeline separate from the weight loss timeline. What's been the hardest part to let go of?
 
20 years left and not wanting to spend them overweight is the clearest version of why the medication matters for the OP who has been at it since age 7. The mourning piece is real but what you don't want to carry forward matters just as much as what you're letting go. That framing is actually the most useful one here.
 
The time variable is the honest answer that most people find unsatisfying - the skin does continue to improve for 2-3 years after reaching a stable weight, but the degree of recovery is genuinely individual and influenced by how long excess weight was carried and at what age. the list of practical interventions is right; none of them produce dramatic results on their own but the combination over time is what moves the baseline
 
The fat phobia point in why the research took so long to develop effective pharmacological treatments is real. Obesity as a disease with underlying mechanisms that GLP-1s address is the shift in framing that changes how people think about this. You don't have to be in therapy to benefit from the medication just like you don't need counseling to take blood pressure drugs.
 
Everyone, including you, has earned the right to carry less fat and feel comfortable in their own body. That extra weight sits behind so many illnesses, so much inflammation, on and on. That said - our situations line up pretty closely. I gravitate toward whole foods, stay active, log my daily walking, and never loved counting every calorie. My brain has been screaming for a binge since I was a kid. Know what finally shut that voice up? A small dose of glp1. My body fat's down further than it's ever gone before. I can actually make out muscle shape all over now, something new for me entirely. I hardly ever dwell on food, bingeing, or eating myself sick these days. You deserve that same relief.
 
I was the stocky kid growing up. Not exactly overweight, but noticeably bigger than my cousins and friends. First real diet attempt I remember was age fifteen, one summer, weighing around 150 pounds, tried that awful laxative-based diet and dropped roughly 15 pounds, though naturally it didn't last. Gave up after that. Bounced between 150 and 175 the entire way through high school and college.

Always had some athletic ability, figured out that staying active kept me from creeping past 175. Coaches and friends were often shocked at my actual weight since I didn't visually carry it that way.

Enlisted and had to get down to 155. Over the following years, even with regular exercise, keeping weight steady got harder. Drifted up to 185 and basically stayed there through the rest of my service. Struggled maintaining it, though physically I was in peak shape during that stretch.

After leaving the service, stayed active but the number kept climbing anyway. Eventually hit 305 and opted for weight loss surgery. Dropped to 220 and held there roughly a decade.

At 65, got assigned a new primary doctor. By then I'd crept back up to 230, on blood pressure medication and pre-diabetic. Tried fasting and Metformin, along with movement
 
Agree with basically everything said here. Same story for me too, couldn't keep off weight I'd lost drug-free before, and I'm here now because I see these medications as a solid tool for managing intake (with hope for a metabolic boost from Reta too).

Also picked up an incredible amount about food and nutrition logging every single calorie for a full year straight. Not doing that this round since I've already internalized my portions and macronutrient breakdown without needing the daily grind of logging. Now that overeating's basically off the table even if I wanted to, I trust my clean whole-food routine of vegetables, legumes, and protein will carry me there.

Despise nearly every kind of exercise besides walking, but long shifts limit how often I can get out. So I'm doing light resistance work instead, just enough to hold onto muscle and bone density, nowhere near enough to build bulk even outside a deficit.

You can absolutely get results relying purely on the medication if it trims your intake enough on its own. But my priority's long-term health for my family, so building solid habits alongside it means fat loss and better overall health instead of ending up a skinny-but-unhealthy version of myself like before.

Great post!
 
Quick context before this, this whole message doubles as a note to myself too, honestly I'm dealing with something similar. Been slacking and leaning too heavily on convenience food lately. So we're navigating this together! That said, I've cycled through this pattern a few times now, and here's what I've picked up along the way:

Probably heard these tips endlessly already, but I'll say it anyway, things tend to slip gradually over time. So my suggestion would be circling back to the basics, really zeroing in on protein and hydration. Genuinely ask yourself whether you're actually hitting those recommended targets. Personally, eating naturally shrinks once protein's dialed in properly, but it drifts as the weeks go on and needs a conscious reset now and then.

And if exercise isn't part of the picture yet, might be time to introduce it (if that's the case, let me know, I get that starting can feel daunting, but I can share how I got moving despite dealing with a chronic illness myself if that'd help). Or if you're already active, maybe it's time to push harder.

Across any weight loss path, GLP1 or not, there tend to be several turning points
 
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